10 of the Most Amusing Tips for Singles

We’ve all been there a time or two about what sorts of things you can do to find greater success while dating, whether it is online or if it’s the conventional way. We’ve scoured the internet and even asked some of our members what they believe were some of the funniest dating tips they’ve encountered or received. Here are the top ten responses.

1. Bathroom selfies as a profile picture

For the love of all that is holy, please oh please stop making the profile picture for your dating profile one that you took in the mirror of your bathroom. Or, if at the very least make sure there a) isn’t a toilet in the background or b) something floating in said toilet. When you take a bathroom selfie, it looks like you’ve run out of ideas (seriously, you couldn’t take a selfie at least in your bedroom??), but you also have no friends to tell you, “No, this is a bad idea. Let me help you out.”

2. Try to avoid the profile that relies on clichés.

Everyone likes long walks on the beach. Everyone loves music. Everyone is looking for that special someone. We get it. These type of answers are so cookie cutter and non-descript, you may as well have posted a bunch of things women want to hear in your profile. If you’re going to use a cliché, bend it so that it is interesting. For example, if you’re a “Glass half full” kind of guy, make a joke about how you’re bad at carrying a tray full of drinks. Use your humor to get you through!

3. Always check and double check your spelling and grammar.

It’s a headache trying to read a profile that reads like it was written by a student in elementary school. Always make sure you are using punctuation in the correct places because “eating out, my dog” reads a completely differently without the comma. Ew, just ew — try and get that mental picture out of your head!

4. The best time to send someone an email is on a Sunday.

During the week, many people are too busy with their lives to hunker down in front of a computer and respond to emails. So, wait on a Sunday and they are less likely to be busy and more willing to communicate with some random person who pops up. Nice!

5. Don’t waste your time trying to find love for the holidays.

Whoever said this is a rule to follow is just greedy and doesn’t want one more person taking away from their possible matches. Studies show that the holidays are the busiest time of year for online dating sites — no one wants to be alone during this time and they are more willing to dating!

6. Follow your matches star sign.

If you’re superstitious, the star sign of the person you are interested in may be able to give you a good idea about their personality and other traits about them. Of course, if you don’t give two hoots about astrology, at the very least their star sign, will let you know when their birthday is coming up.

7. Always try the phone test prior to the date.

People say that you should always make a point to talk to your match on the phone first before agreeing to meet up. Why? Because when you talk to them on the phone, you can get a better sense of how they react in social settings. Of course, this doesn’t always work, but it’s always nice to hear what they sound like beforehand at least.

8. Show interest in the person you’re meeting.

This should go without saying of course. Why on Earth would anyone agree to go out on a date with someone that they have absolutely no interest in? Ask them anything that keeps the conversation flowing and add your own stories to the conversation to keep things going nicely.

9. If you want to get out of a bad date, install a homosexual dating app and leave it out on the table.

This may seem childish, but if you aren’t the type of person to end things prematurely, no matter how poorly things are going, you can let them end it for you. Simply leave your phone out on the table and just wait for the push notification from that app. Your date will get the wrong idea, but it’ll all work out in your favor.

10. Issue a loyalty card at the beginning of the date.

If you are the type of person who is worried about getting a second date, try a humorous approach by offering a loyalty card like popular eateries do. Offer something like “Go on 4 dates, get a free bouquet of chocolate roses on the 5th .” Something cute and quirky goes a long way.