Is Your Best Friend Jealous of Your Relationship? Here’s What to Know

You may have recently noticed that your forever friend has been acting up or behaving strangely around you. Have they got you wondering what you’ve done wrong? You’re not wrong to question their behaviour, certainly if you have suspicions that they are showing signs they are jealous of your relationship.

What to do if you think a friend is sabotaging your relationship

Are they repeatedly telling you that you need to ‘play the field’? Do they encourage cheating behaviours or perhaps even flirt with you in front of your partner? These are all signs that your friend is probably jealous of the strong bond that you and your partner have.

Whether your bestie is a man or woman, whether you have a romantic history or not, everyone gets jealous and it is a natural reaction to protect the things a person holds dear. It just so happens that the thing in this instance is you and the threat is your partner.

While your friend’s behaviour may seem unkind, the chances are it comes from a place of affection. It may cross your mind that perhaps your guy friend has caught feelings for you or that your relationship has made old feelings rise. Just remember that if you are truly friends, with a hot drink and some time together to talk, things will work out and it is in fact possible to maintain friendships with the opposite sex even if you’re in a relationship.

Perhaps they don’t sabotage your relationship. What if they are nasty to you? There are many clues to telling if your friend is jealous of you.

Signs your friend is jealous of your relationship

Do they make nasty comments or give you false praise? Do they leave you out? Perhaps they choose not to include themselves when you’ve invited them somewhere. These are all signs of someone who is jealous of you for the relationship that you’re in. Nastiness from best friends in relationships doesn’t only stem from their belief in their ownership of you as your longtime friend. No. It could all be put down to the fact that they envy how happy you are with your partner. Certainly, if your friend is single and has been for a while, your relationship may seem like rubbing salt in an open wound to them. Their excuses for not coming out for that birthday meal you invited them to may be because they don’t want to be confronted with the fact that they want what you have. Seeing you laugh and have fun with your partner on the opposite side of the table is probably not something that need on a Friday night as they go home alone to an empty house. While you need to confront them about their behaviour be mindful of how they feel and try to understand from their perspective.

Being jealous of other relationships may even stem from a root of insecurities

In the same way that your friend may envy the relationship you have with your partner and desire to have the same, your friend may be insecure about themselves. This is almost a combination of how they are jealous of both you and your relationship. This feeling could be so much so that it is your very happiness that reminds them of how rubbish they feel about themselves and how they may believe that ‘no one will ever love me like they love each other’. To put it in a really basic example, maybe they are insecure about their teeth and they see you laughing and smiling and kissing your partner. These acts revolve around the mouth and showing off your teeth and so your friend may start to think to themselves ‘if I had nice teeth like her, I might be able to find someone who loves me’. If this idea can be translated into every single aspect of your relationship, then you’ll find problems beginning to occur in your friendship. Make sure whatever it is they are struggling with, you put the time into supporting them get over their insecurities.

The upshot of this all is, nothing is fixed with silence unless you are making an effort to listen to them actively. For whatever reasons you might think that your friend is frustrated with your relationship, talk to them. Make sure you make time for them and ask them out to lunch or do something that is reminiscent of the old times you both spent together. Give them space to live in the moment and remind them that friends always come first.