How to Not Be Nervous on a Date and Make a Great First Impression
There’s no denying that when your crush agrees to go out with you, you’re going to feel like a million bucks and nothing can get in your way. That is, until the nerves start setting in and you become a nervous wreck!
Even though it isn’t uncommon for men and women to both experience pre-date jitters, you don’t have to let those nerves ruin your chances of making a great first impression.
Today, we want to give you a few tips and sage pieces of advice that’ll help you get rid of nerves before a first date, feel more confident, and maybe even score a second date! So grab yourself a beverage, a snack and let’s get this show on the road, shall we?
10 Tips on How to Not Be Nervous on a Date
Almost everyone is going to feel a little bit of anxiety before a first date, and it’s actually pretty rare to find someone who doesn’t get nervous. However, it’s important to note that we all react differently to that anxiety.
Some people will just have a mild twinge that makes their stomach feel like it’s in knots. Then you have others who experience social anxiety and they find it very difficult to just…
Whatever side of the spectrum you’re on, we have a few tips that’ll help you get rid of those first date nerves and enjoy your date.
Tip #1: Be In Charge of Planning the Date
A lot of times, people get nervous about a first date because they aren’t in control of what’s going to happen on said date. Think about it… How many times have you gone on a first date that failed miserably because your date suggested you go somewhere you felt uncomfortable to go to.
We suggest that instead of leaving the planning up in the air, you shouldn’t be afraid to suggest meeting somewhere you feel comfortable. For example, maybe there’s this perfect little hole in the wall that makes delicious sliders and the atmosphere is relaxed and laid back. Or maybe you’re awesome at mini-golf and you really want to impress. By going to a mini-golf course, you get the chance to show your skills, but you can also find a lot of things to talk about when you aren’t concentrating on lining up the perfect shot.
Tip #2: Find Ways to Be More Comfortable
Part of the trick to getting rid of nerves before a first date is to be comfortable – not just comfortable where you’re going or what you’re doing on the date, but just in general.
Some ways you can do this is by doing a little meditation, taking a long bath, or wear an outfit that makes you feel as good as you look. They may seem like small things, but those small actions can go a long way to calming those jittery nerves.
Tip #3: Don’t Set High Expectations, Keep Things Informal
It’s so important that you remember that this is a first date. That means don’t go into the date expecting to find your soul mate. Instead, we recommend approaching the date like an informal meetup where you’re just feeling the waters to see if there’s any kind of chemistry between you and your date.
Remember, when you don’t set crazy expectations, you can’t be disappointed.
Tip #4: Understand That Your Date is Probably Nervous, Too
Newsflash! You aren’t going to be the only person who has a case of the first date nerves. Chances are, your date is pretty nervous too! Just by accepting and acknowledging this can alleviate a lot of the nervousness that you may feel.
Tip #5: Don’t Get Lost In Your Own Head – Always Be Present
One of the biggest mistakes people do when they’re nervous on a date is to get lost in their own head, worrying about this or that. What they don’t realize is that by being in their own head, they aren’t able to listen to the other person and do their part in keeping the conversation flowing.
With that said, you shouldn’t feel like it’s up to you to keep the conversation going either. If things feel a little awkward, remember, your date is probably as nervous as you.
Tip #6: Keep Yourself Busy the Day Before Your Date
One of the easiest ways to keep those first date nerves at bay is by keeping yourself busy the day (or days, depending on how nervous you tend to get) before the date. How can you stay busy? Well, some ideas include:
● Pampering yourself with a spa day.
● Have a friend come over to help choose an outfit for the date.
● Get a really good work out in the day before.
● Bake something (just don’t forget about it like Clueless’ Cher did on her date!).
Tip #7: Give Yourself a Pep-Talk to Boost Confidence
Sometimes one of the easiest ways to get rid of nerves is by giving yourself a little pep talk. Remind yourself that getting the date is the hardest part because obviously the person likes you, otherwise they wouldn’t have agreed to go out with you!
Here’s a sample of a pep-talk we like to give ourselves before that date with someone really special:
“You look amazing in that outfit! Your partner isn’t going to be able to take their eyes off you! Just remember that although this is a first date, it isn’t the first one you’ve ever been on. If you two have a connection, that’s great. But if you don’t, that’s okay too. Remember, you scored the date so you’re doing great! Take a deep breath and remember your date is a person too and they are probably doing the same thing you are right now. You got this!”
Tip #8: Remember to Be Yourself
Remember when Genie told Aladdin to “Just bee yourself?” That’s is some pretty wise advice coming from a Disney character, wouldn’t you say?
In all seriousness though, don’t feel like you have to put on an act for your date. They agreed to go out on a date with you, so there’s something about you that intrigues them. Be proud of who you are and let your date get to know you better.
Tip #9: Challenge Your Anxious Thinking
Once your date is over and you’ve said your goodbyes, you have to resist replaying every minute of the date, trying to pick things apart looking for some secret meaning. This is especially important if your date didn’t go as smoothly as you’d hoped it would, because by nitpicking over the negative parts of the date is just going to leave you feeling confused, disappointed, and less likely to want to date again for some time.
Tip #10: Practice Makes Perfect – Even with Dating
Throughout your life, you’re probably going to go out on several first dates. Instead of looking at these dates as a failed experience, look at them as a learning experience.
That joke you told over dessert didn’t get the response you wanted? Great, now you know not to tell that joke.
Your date to the outdoor mini-golf course didn’t go over well because it was too hot? Great, now you know to remember to check the weather before making plans.
It’s worth noting that you shouldn’t just learn from the negative parts of a date – you should learn from the positive too! For example, maybe you found a new restaurant that is perfect for first dates because it has a great atmosphere, great food, and drinks, and there are even things to do like play pool or darts.
In short, treat every aspect of the date as a learning experience.
Recap: How to Get Over First Date Nerves
A first date is a source of much nervousness for a lot of people, but with these 10 tips, you’ll find it easier to relax and enjoy your date. Sometimes all it takes is just giving yourself something to do before the date and giving yourself a pep-talk the day off. Other times you might need to remind yourself that your date is probably as nervous as you are and that it isn’t just up to you to keep a conversation flowing.
At the end of the day, dating is something that can be fun, exciting, and even a little scary. However, you should always approach the date mild expectations, a positive attitude, and a willingness to get to know the person you’re going out with!
Even if things don’t work out, at least you went out, gave it your all, and met someone new.
Sign up to Flirt.com get rid of those pesky nerves before your date. We’d love to hear from you!