The Mind Games Women Play and How to Beat Them


Understanding the mind games women play

The saying goes that men are from Mars and women are from Venus and that is particularly true when it comes to dating and the games that women play and a man’s interpretation of them. While a man may thing a woman is playing mind games she may in fact, be making sure that you are worth of her time and attention. Never the less that can make it quite difficult when working out what she is thinking and whether or not she actually wants to date you or what she expects from you. We take a look at how to tell if she’s playing mind games and how to beat them.

How to tell if she’s playing mind games

Before we learn how to deal with the mind games that women play it is important to understand what they are and if she is actually playing with you. There are a number of ways in which a woman can mess with your mind but it could also be just innocent things that aren’t designed to mess with you but perhaps her wondering if you are into her like she is with you.

• Not returning your calls or messages for days
• Dressing to kill but you are not allowed to touch her
• Flirting with your friends in order to see your reaction
• The bait game – do I look fat in these pants?
• Playing dumb

Not all women will be playing games and the trick is to know when you are being played, whether it is anything to be concerned about or something to laugh about or whether to cut your losses and tell her you are not interested in someone who plays games.

When she doesn’t return your calls or messages

This is a biggie and sometimes comes from an inherent thing that is installed in women to not be the first to call or message and not to be too keen to respond. When she is playing a game though you will see a pattern. Maybe she only responds when she wants something or when she can be bothered. If she is busy with her friends or focused on other things you may be way down on the list of priorities. If you are a booty call for her then perhaps she will be quick to respond. The way to approach this is to either fight fire with fire and play games with her (not a healthy way to pursue a relationship) or cut your losses and move on.

The innocent explanation


Sometimes women don’t even realise they are playing games. In fact, they may be under the impression that it is you that is playing games and not the other way around. Let’s face it, often men aren’t the greatest at remembering to call or message back and it’s often not a big deal to you if you were the last person to send a message or if you haven’t replied to the rhetorical message she sent. Maybe you haven’t heard from her because she sent the last text or because she is waiting for you to call her. Maybe she is holding out messaging you because she wants to make you wait and to find out if you really like her. Perhaps she is afraid of coming across too keen. She may not be as into you as you are to her but there could be many reasons she’s hasn’t been in touch.

When she is attention seeking

There are a few attention-seeking tools that women use, some of them more recognisable than others. It may be that she is just insecure and looking for constant reassurance or she could temporarily be trying to get you to do something that she wants to do instead of what you want to do. Maybe you are well into a football match and not giving her the attention she wants or perhaps she is feeling left out when you are talking to a friend. If she is bored and wants you to give her some attention, she could pull the classic ‘we need to talk’ line out of the bag to make you stop what you are doing concerned that you have done something wrong or that she is.

How to deal with the attention seeking mind games

You have a choice to make here. You can either drop what you are doing and respond to her demands or you can ignore it. The trouble is you are stuck between a rock and a hard place in some instances but if it means you are going to be perpetually unhappy then taking the risk and ignoring it could be your best plan of action. Giving in to her constant demands for attention is going to leave you downtrodden and frustrated in the end. Explain to her that you will be right with her but that perhaps there is a better time that you can have a discussion when you will have her full attention.

Figuring out if she is just high maintenance

All sorts of women play mind games. Some of them are insecure and using their manipulation to get constant reassurance while others have tickets on themselves and think that they should be on a pedestal. These high maintenance women are going to take some getting used to and a lot of patience. If she is one of these then you have to decide if you can handle this. The other type of woman is the one that plays the odd game but nothing that will affect your relationship. It may be completely innocent and just what she is used to, in which case you don’t have too much to worry about.

Identifying the mind games is the first part of the puzzle, then it is up to you to decide how to handle it. If you are keen to pursue your relationship then you may be prepared to put up with or at least to talk to her about it and explain that you are not really into games. If she is a big game player then you have to ask how much of a relationship you can actually have with someone like this or if it is time to find someone that spends less time messing with your head.