To Pay or Not to Pay, Find Out The Men Who Will and Those Who Won’t

Amid the growing landscape of gender equality, many young men across the United States still wonder why they are expected to pick up the tab when they go out with women. These young fellows search for some sort of intimacy by going on countless dates, and even though technology has improved how they go about this, there are still some old-fashioned traditions that seem to not go away. Among these traditions is the idea of men having to pay when they date a woman—at least the first date.

But, the question of what is purchased on the date and why is it even fair? If a woman only earns 77 cents for every dollar a man makes, is this rule a way to make up for that inequality?

Some men say yes as they even plan their monthly budget for it: “When I am going on a date, I just assume I am going to pay. As a rule, of thumb I offer, well, I insist on paying the bill. I just feel like men pay the bill on the first date. Well, on most dates. I do think that is the norm,” he says. This young man believes that it is only right because he was the one who asked her out in the first place.

According to this young man, the crucial moment is when the bill comes and the way a woman reacts will determine what kind of woman she is. There are four groups which a woman could fall into.

1. The largest group, 40% of women, won’t even suggest that she pitches in, as she automatically expects that he will pay.

2. The second group, about 25% of women, will pretend to offer to pay, to which the man will fake insist on paying, knowing he was going to have to pay anyway.

3. The third group, about 30% of ladies, is the genuine reach. These women express the desire to help pay for the date, even though he will still insist on paying.

4. Then the fourth group, 5% of women, are insistent on paying, even after he counter-offers.

The final group may seem like a positive thing for men, but it could actually be an indicator that the date isn’t going well and by over-insisting on paying her half of the bill, men tend to question if there is something he has done wrong. He may even come to the conclusion that she doesn’t want to feel obligated to the man for anything.

Men, even the most traditional of them, will admit that they like when a woman pays for an outing even if it is just once in a while.

One guy says, “I do appreciate it when women pay for me, especially if we have been dating for a while.

It’s this situation where suddenly it’s not that ‘I am dating you’, it’s that ‘we are dating each other’.”

Perhaps it is all in the way we approach dating. Instead of looking at it as an obligation, perhaps the topic of who pays should be met with the openness that doesn’t require thought but a “take turns” type of methodology instead. After all, a relationship is a partnership rather than a dictatorship.