How to Date a Black Woman

white man with black woman

Dating is an incredibly nuanced art that requires consideration, calm and thoughtfulness from the people involved. To be able to date successfully, you need to be able to think beyond yourself and understand the person you’re dating on a more meaningful level. However, although the basic principle applies, when you’re dating different ethnicities to yourself there are some things you should take into consideration. We aren’t generalizing or stereotyping the type of African-American ladies you may come across, but, are instead, making you aware of social differences that occur in American black communities which alter the way they date and what they’re looking for in a partner.

Dating a Black Woman for the First Time

If you have never been a part of an interracial coupling or have never dated a strong black woman before, then there are certain things you need to be aware of that will alter your dating method. As always, there are exceptions to the rule and there will be women who don’t fit into these categories, but it is down to you to use your head and decide what is appropriate in the moment.


Many people, when dating an ethnic minority for the first time, become extremely nervous on their dates as they’re concerned about offending their partner. It is good to be considerate of your partner, especially in America where discrimination against the black community and other minorities is still rife but going overboard will put you in a negative light. You may seem twitchy, uninteresting or it may appear that all you’re seeing when dating this woman is the colour of her skin. Relax, talk to her like a normal human being and think before you speak.

Other People’s Attitudes & Opinions

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Everybody has an opinion and they love to share it, so you need to be prepared for insensitive comments about the nature of your relationship. Many people seem to think of someone from their race as their own and that they should only date people from that community, so you may receive a lot of negative comments and jokes about the nature of your relationship. You can either let it go and continue to enjoy the companionship of your lovely partner or you can let it affect your relationship and ultimately lose someone you could come to love and cherish.

Be Yourself

It may sound like the oldest dating cliché in the book, but that’s because it works! People can tell when you’re being ingenuine or false and don’t want to date someone who can’t be open about their opinions or accept themselves. You don’t need to ‘act black’ or behave in a certain way to attract a strong independent black woman as a lot of the time they’ll think you’re an idiot for even thinking you had to act that way to attract them in the first place.


As with any date, understand that you’re going in blind and don’t know a thing about your potential partner. No matter how much you’ve messaged before going on your date, you’re never going to have their full trust and confidence from the off. Understand that if you’re going to bring up race on your date, then you’re playing with fire as you don’t know what abuse they may have received in their life or how they have been treated because of the color of their skin. You don’t need to mother them but maintain a thoughtful and sensitive approach when discussing tender subjects.

Where to Start Dating African Ladies?

black women like white men

So, you know that you prefer a black woman, but want to know where you can meet a plethora of ebony black chicks who’re perfect for you. We know it can be difficult, especially if you haven’t dated a black woman before, so we have come up with the best ideas to help you engage with the black dating community and find yourself a lovely lady to date.

Online Dating

The modern world is full of wonderful technological advances that allow us to communicate more openly and discover new people with ease. If you’re shy or unsure of where to find black women near you, then online dating is your perfect solution. You can filter for who you’re looking for and find compatible African-American ladies without any trouble. Furthermore, as you can craft responses in your own time, you’ll be able to put into practice thoughtful and sensitive dating methods.


Many couples still meet at their place of work or when they’re studying as you meet the same people every day and can easily build a relationship from there. Through evolution, we have been hard-wired to fall in love with people we see often and have regular interactions with which is why we tend to fall for people at our workplace or school. You must be careful as this can affect your schooling or career if your advances aren’t wanted or are inappropriate. Make sure you check your workplace guidelines and try to determine whether the woman in question is interested before making the dating leap of faith.


If you think it is too risky to approach someone at work, then meeting someone at a class or workshop is another fantastic way of finding love. Firstly, you’re both there to do something you’re interested in, so you already have a common interest. Secondly, there is less risk of getting fired or being disciplined for making your advances known. Lastly, you’re on neutral territory where you will both feel comfortable with being open about your feelings.

Out & About

Don’t be afraid to approach that girl at a bar or make a nice gesture at a coffeehouse! It can be scary as you can’t control the situation as much, but if you don’t take the chance, then you’ll never get the girl. Don’t fear rejection but allow it to help you grow and improve your dating stratagem.

How to Date a Black Girl?

black women relationships

So, you’ve asked her out, you’ve been on a couple of dates and then what? How do you ensure that you can move your relationship forward and ensure her you’re committed about the relationship? Well, we have a few ideas to help you out and move from dating to falling in love!


We aren’t talking about picking a fight with every guy you see or showing off ‘the guns’, but instead using something subtler; be protective, humble and don’t overestimate yourself. Men typically take on a protector role, so some aggression – when aptly placed and not overdone – shows a woman you care about her and are ready to defend her when necessary. Being humble and understanding your boundaries shows a woman you have the qualities necessary to become a father which is incredibly attractive at least on a subconscious and primitive level.

Future Focused

Many African-American women tend to come from more socially conservative, religious and family-orientated homes, meaning they have grown up in a social circle that has placed emphasis on planning for the future. Showing the woman, you love that you’re prepared to think about your future TOGETHER and are making steps to integrate your lives with one another can be incredibly attractive for a black woman.


Although many black women look forward to planning their lives with their partner, they still need their space and time to be the wonderful person they are. Understand that a strong independent black woman doesn’t need you all the time and that they’re happy to do their own thing and be their own person.


Any prosperous relationship needs good communicative skills as its foundation, but to many black women, it is more than that. Your ability to communicate your feelings, your ambitions, your passions, what you see for the future of your relationship is incredibly important to an impassioned black woman and shows her that you care about the state of your relationships and are ready to fight for its continuation.

You never know where love may lead you and the journey towards can be one of pure bliss if you understand how to behave with care and sensitivity. There are many strong black women who’re waiting to date other ethnicities, so don’t waste your time wondering; put yourself out there and show how passionate you’re about the relationship you’re undertaking with this woman. As always, use our tips as a guideline to your dating experience, but understand that you need to be able to adapt to your woman’s needs and wants if you’re going to be able to date successfully. Go online and start wowing the amazing women in your local area; treat them with respect, kindness, and love and you’ll soon find yourself in a magnificent relationship with an amazing black woman.

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