What You Need to Know About Dating Japanese Women
The Japanese Dating Culture
The Japanese dating culture greatly differs from that of the dating culture in the Western world, so there are some things to bear in mind! In Japan, you don’t just meet a girl and ask her out – if you like someone you arrange to hang out in a group where you bring your male friends and she brings her female friends. Then you try to spend time alone talking to her during the night.
After five or six such group meetings, you can ask a girl to meet you alone (kind of like a Western “date”). However, you don’t get physical during these dates, you just spend time together. After five or six such dates you have to “confess your love” to the person and after that you become a couple, which is when the real dating starts (i.e. you get physical – the handholding, kissing and, eventually, sex, start). If you already have a Japanese girlfriend, advice to the wise: take it slow. Don’t rush the physical side. Now, to foreigners it might sound strange to say ‘I love you’ after five dates, but you have to bear in mind that the Japanese don’t have a term for “I like you” the way Westerners do. Think about it as confessing to falling in love with someone, not being in love with them. It’s an ongoing process, not a “forever.”
Dating in Japan for Foreigners
Do Japanese women like American men? Or British men? Or men from any other place? As with anything else it’s about personal chemistry – we’re attracted to the traits of another person, no matter what their nationality. However, you’re much more likely to find a Japanese girlfriend, dating on their terms. If you behave as you would in the Western world, you might very well scare them off. Just imagine if you met a foreign girl in America through a blind date and she told you she loved you on the second date! You’d likely run for your life, because in America “I love you” are big words. It’s not something you say on a second date unless you’ve known the person for a long time before you started dating. Even if the girl meant it the way she loves ice cream, you wouldn’t take it that way. This is why being aware of cultural differences are so important – you might accidentally put each other off otherwise.
What Is It Like to Date a Japanese Man?
If we turn this around, what is it like to date a Japanese man? Well, he isn’t going to be your typical American guy who asks you out for a date the day he meets you! The same rules as to dating Japanese women apply, only the man might take the initiative a little bit more. However, that’s not always the case, so don’t expect it. Rather try and show your interest, but in a subtle manner, following the tradition with “group dates” as a starting point and chatting to him during those gatherings.